Super Quick Update -- and a Big Decision

I did end up hearing from MG yesterday while I was a work. He sent a perky text wishing me a Happy New Year and that he was at his grandma's a couple hours away.

My first thought was, "his grandmother is still alive?" (MG is about 8 years older than me.) But I lost all grandparents I had any emotional attachment to in the late 1980's, so I have to stop and remember that my situation is not the norm. Then I have to admit I was pleased to hear from him, and that he didn't mention any food.

Me, being me, replied with a sassy text, and I texted him today along the lines of his favorite subject. But in spite of that, I've made a decision.

I'm not calling it a "New Year's Resolution" or anything like that. It's merely a decision.

I'm taking back my body.

I am who I am. I am the size that I am. If I want to be thinner, then by all means I know how to do it and I will take those steps. If I want to be heavier (God only know why), I certainly know how to do that. But in the end, it will not be a man* who makes that decision. It will not be because a man thinks I'd be prettier if I was thinner, or sexier if my bellies were rounder. It will be because I want it to be that way.

Love me for who I am. Don't look to change me. I'm 43, set in most of my ways. I want to grow as a person, but I'm not going to change just because someone dangles "love" in front of me like some sort of carrot. My happiness, my health, my self esteem are worthy of it. I'm worthy of it. And it's time I truly learned that lesson and lived by it.





*My primary doctors are all female, but several of my specialists are male. If one of them tells me to lose weight for one of my health conditions, then obviously that's a different situation altogether.

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