Not Even a Soap Opera Writer Could Come Up With This...
My Life: A Soap Opera
in innumerable acts
Tonight's cast of characters:
TG: Tinder Guy/boyfriend.... well, not anymore.
MG: Match Guy, from right before the boyfriend
LAE: Long Ago Ex, a guy I dated briefly who periodically pops up
All events have actually happened in the past 3 days or so. Only the names have been changed to protect the identities of the men involved.
So... on Thursday I got dumped. Except he didn't actually have the cajones to say as much, and it took him almost 2 days to be able to tell me. The same day TG and I got tickets to a concert in late January and had made plans to get together the following night, his ex-girlfriend called. That was Tuesday. I got dumped on Thursday.
Now, I knew about her. And I knew there was some serious unresolved issues there. I am more empathetic than many of you might be, or are willing to be, because it was over 2 years and a painful email before I got closure from the break-up with D. I certainly went through a period where, although I knew the relationship was toxic, if he had called or texted and said he'd made a big mistake, I would have taken him back. Humans like things that are comfortable and familiar, even if they aren't good for us. Although TG had told the ex about me, she was persuasive. He didn't like breaking up with me. He didn't really want to break up with me. But he'd agreed to give her another chance.
At first I was going to fight for him. Then I thought about it, slept on it, and told him I wasn't. He had made his choice. He'd broken my heart (words I knew he didn't want to hear). I didn't realize how emotionally invested in him I'd become. We'd been together for 6 weeks (yet it felt longer) and had been making all sorts of plans for the future, when everything was suddenly turned upside down. I poured my depression out all over Facebook. I ugly cried. A LOT. I was prone to bouts of absolute sobbing. I haven't taken a break-up this hard in years and it surprised me. I also consumed a lot of wine.
Friday was a horrid day. The crying, playing a concert where one of the pieces was about depression and suicide prevention. Concerned friends being supportive and yet their gestures of love would bring on more tears. I tried valiantly to keep the mask in place. I put on my war paint and went on with life. I slept a lot.
Saturday then started off... weirdly. I was in bed, repeatedly hitting my snooze button and trying to convince myself that I had to get up and that I could not call out from work. Somewhere in the sleepy, dark recesses of my mind I thought I heard a custom text tone -- for MG.
Now although the second date with MG had ended weirdly -- and clearly indicating there would not be a date #3 -- we still remained friends and had exchanged a couple of friendly texts. Still, I was surprised. Then I thought I heard it again, so I reached for my phone. Yup. 2 texts from MG. He'd seen a promo for a concert I'm involved in on TV, and asked me about it. Okay, fine. Then the conversation turned to more personal matters. How was I? How was life? Was I still on Match? I told him I'd been recently dumped and was taking a break from those sites. (Like, for forever, but I didn't say that.) We continued to text. And text. He told me he wanted to buy me lunch or dinner.
Say, what?
We agreed on the nebulous "lunch sometime this week". I thought that would be it. Nope. He kept texting periodically throughout the day. And first thing Sunday morning. And throughout Sunday. Flirty texts, with kissy emojis and the like. While I have no idea why or what is going on, and I'm just rolling with it, it certainly has improved my mood.
Now just when I think my life is weird enough, I come out of rehearsal tonight intending to look at a serious of texts with a colleague to see if I am needed at work tomorrow. I was surprised to see 3 texts from LAE. Now, LAE and I have an agreement of sorts, the acknowledgement of mutual sexual chemistry while not desiring a relationship. For years we've talked about being "friends with benefits," only whenever one or the other of us wants the "benefits" the other is seeing someone. So texts from him are not necessarily unexpected. Tonight the three texts were: 1. if you're ever single, call me... 2. I just moved, here is my new address... 3. Merry Christmas. I replied that I was, in fact, recently single and might be calling him soon... and Merry Christmas.
So here's the status with each of them:
TG: broken up, but he flat out told me he didn't know how long he and the ex would make it, if at all. Implied he'd be popping back up in my life. Whatever. I'll deal with that if and when it comes to be.
MG: texting regularly, more flirty on his end than mine (I'm playing it cool), lunch sometime this week.
LAE: possible hook-up soon for no-strings-attached fun between the sheets.
And yes, I'm still hearing occasionally from my stalker. Because, why not?
Because my life is a soap opera that is so kooky, no daytime TV viewer would ever believe it.
in innumerable acts
Tonight's cast of characters:
TG: Tinder Guy/boyfriend.... well, not anymore.
MG: Match Guy, from right before the boyfriend
LAE: Long Ago Ex, a guy I dated briefly who periodically pops up
All events have actually happened in the past 3 days or so. Only the names have been changed to protect the identities of the men involved.
So... on Thursday I got dumped. Except he didn't actually have the cajones to say as much, and it took him almost 2 days to be able to tell me. The same day TG and I got tickets to a concert in late January and had made plans to get together the following night, his ex-girlfriend called. That was Tuesday. I got dumped on Thursday.
Now, I knew about her. And I knew there was some serious unresolved issues there. I am more empathetic than many of you might be, or are willing to be, because it was over 2 years and a painful email before I got closure from the break-up with D. I certainly went through a period where, although I knew the relationship was toxic, if he had called or texted and said he'd made a big mistake, I would have taken him back. Humans like things that are comfortable and familiar, even if they aren't good for us. Although TG had told the ex about me, she was persuasive. He didn't like breaking up with me. He didn't really want to break up with me. But he'd agreed to give her another chance.
At first I was going to fight for him. Then I thought about it, slept on it, and told him I wasn't. He had made his choice. He'd broken my heart (words I knew he didn't want to hear). I didn't realize how emotionally invested in him I'd become. We'd been together for 6 weeks (yet it felt longer) and had been making all sorts of plans for the future, when everything was suddenly turned upside down. I poured my depression out all over Facebook. I ugly cried. A LOT. I was prone to bouts of absolute sobbing. I haven't taken a break-up this hard in years and it surprised me. I also consumed a lot of wine.
Friday was a horrid day. The crying, playing a concert where one of the pieces was about depression and suicide prevention. Concerned friends being supportive and yet their gestures of love would bring on more tears. I tried valiantly to keep the mask in place. I put on my war paint and went on with life. I slept a lot.
Saturday then started off... weirdly. I was in bed, repeatedly hitting my snooze button and trying to convince myself that I had to get up and that I could not call out from work. Somewhere in the sleepy, dark recesses of my mind I thought I heard a custom text tone -- for MG.
Now although the second date with MG had ended weirdly -- and clearly indicating there would not be a date #3 -- we still remained friends and had exchanged a couple of friendly texts. Still, I was surprised. Then I thought I heard it again, so I reached for my phone. Yup. 2 texts from MG. He'd seen a promo for a concert I'm involved in on TV, and asked me about it. Okay, fine. Then the conversation turned to more personal matters. How was I? How was life? Was I still on Match? I told him I'd been recently dumped and was taking a break from those sites. (Like, for forever, but I didn't say that.) We continued to text. And text. He told me he wanted to buy me lunch or dinner.
Say, what?
We agreed on the nebulous "lunch sometime this week". I thought that would be it. Nope. He kept texting periodically throughout the day. And first thing Sunday morning. And throughout Sunday. Flirty texts, with kissy emojis and the like. While I have no idea why or what is going on, and I'm just rolling with it, it certainly has improved my mood.
Now just when I think my life is weird enough, I come out of rehearsal tonight intending to look at a serious of texts with a colleague to see if I am needed at work tomorrow. I was surprised to see 3 texts from LAE. Now, LAE and I have an agreement of sorts, the acknowledgement of mutual sexual chemistry while not desiring a relationship. For years we've talked about being "friends with benefits," only whenever one or the other of us wants the "benefits" the other is seeing someone. So texts from him are not necessarily unexpected. Tonight the three texts were: 1. if you're ever single, call me... 2. I just moved, here is my new address... 3. Merry Christmas. I replied that I was, in fact, recently single and might be calling him soon... and Merry Christmas.
So here's the status with each of them:
TG: broken up, but he flat out told me he didn't know how long he and the ex would make it, if at all. Implied he'd be popping back up in my life. Whatever. I'll deal with that if and when it comes to be.
MG: texting regularly, more flirty on his end than mine (I'm playing it cool), lunch sometime this week.
LAE: possible hook-up soon for no-strings-attached fun between the sheets.
And yes, I'm still hearing occasionally from my stalker. Because, why not?
Because my life is a soap opera that is so kooky, no daytime TV viewer would ever believe it.
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