The Art of "Hitting"
Good evening, fair readers! Tonight's thesis is an exploration of the art of "hitting," as in, "hitting on someone." Most all of us have been there, either as the recipient or the "hitter." Sometimes it is painfully obvious, and sometimes it is more subtle... a sly double entendre, an "innocent comment." More accurately, it is how being hit upon can perk up someone's day.
This post is inspired by two events that have happened recently. The first was a Facebook status posting by a friend wherein she was announcing with great glee that she was fairly certain she'd been hit on. The second was an incident that happened to me this evening. In both cases, the ladies involved were not 100% sure we'd actually been hit upon, but the effect was the same: we were both flattered.
The painfully obvious ones can often be comical. For me, one in particular comes to mind. I've mentioned it here before on this blog, as it came via an initial Match email. The bachelor (who I didn't not pursue communication with) actually wrote to me that he wasn't sure if there was a person with a more beautiful smile in this world, but if there was, she was most certainly my sister. Although that beats out classics such as "your legs must be tired because you've been running around in my head/my dreams all day/night," "is heaven missing an angel, because I think I just found her," and one a former used to say to me, "nice shoes! Wanna f@ck?" it was still pretty cheesy.
The more subtle ones are, at least for me, more flattering. Perhaps it is because I believe there is more sincerity in them. People who are seriously interested in someone don't just up and say dumb things to them. (Well, okay, we do, but not stupid bad pick-up lines.) Instead they will hide behind a safe wall of insecurity by using comments that could be interpreted in multiple ways -- thus providing them a safety net in the event the pass is not favorably received.
That was the case for me this evening. I met a reasonably cute guy thanks to very unfortunate circumstances. Nothing like coming out of work, in this instance teaching a class at one of the gyms, to discover your driver's side window smashed to smithereens and your purse gone to really put a damper on your day. The sheriff's deputy who first responded was the previously mentioned reasonably cute guy. Here's how the subtle pass went down.
Because a smashed window and stolen purse wasn't enough crap for one night, it was also raining. A nice, 36* rain. In other words, it was damp and ridiculously cold, and we were having to stand outside dealing with police reports, which just sucked. So he invited me to sit in his cruiser. On our way there, I had to make my usual witty comments -- in times of stress in particular one of my coping mechanisms is to crack sarcastic jokes about everything -- about how I'd never been in the back of a police cruiser before. After a little joking about it, he said, "Well, if I was going to take you anywhere, I'd be taking you home."
Double entendre comment. My home? His home? What isn't coming across on the blog is the tone that he said it with. That is what pushes this from innocent comment to potential pass. Given the circumstances, I didn't respond either way. He was cute enough, and I know for a fact he has a good, steady job. I also think he was another bit of cougar-bait for me. It's not worth obsessing over, because the likelihood of anything coming of it is basically nil. Yes, we exchanged numbers -- because mine was required for his police report and his as part of the victim services.
What I will carry with me is also what my friend got out of her encounter -- a boost to the self esteem. In her case, she was out running routine errands. She's been happily married for several years, and has a 7 year old son. Her "radar" was a bit off, so she wasn't sure if she was actually hit upon or not. As she said to me in an email exchange, being married for so long makes you kind of "cold" to such things. However, whether it was a real pass or not, it added an extra bounce to her step. It made her glow. She was happy!
For me, it makes no difference if the deputy's comment was a pass or not. After teaching two cardio classes and then standing in the cold drizzle, I wasn't exactly feeling all that attractive. Oh, and we can't forget how sunny my mood was, too, with that whole stolen purse & destroyed car window thing. I took it as the flattering comment it may or may not have been intended to be, just like when I'd be out with friends at a gay bar and a lesbian would hit one me. It makes no difference if the passer is someone the passee finds attractive, because just knowing that someone found you beautiful (or handsome) is enough to brighten the darkest of days.
So whether it was his comment or the fact that a kind citizen discovered my discarded purse, which thankfully had my employee ID in it and he called down to the gym to let them know he had my stuff, it makes no difference. My night was improved and, in spite of having to drive home on a speedy interstate with no driver's window and 36* rain coming down, I had a little extra bounce to my step.
This post is inspired by two events that have happened recently. The first was a Facebook status posting by a friend wherein she was announcing with great glee that she was fairly certain she'd been hit on. The second was an incident that happened to me this evening. In both cases, the ladies involved were not 100% sure we'd actually been hit upon, but the effect was the same: we were both flattered.
The painfully obvious ones can often be comical. For me, one in particular comes to mind. I've mentioned it here before on this blog, as it came via an initial Match email. The bachelor (who I didn't not pursue communication with) actually wrote to me that he wasn't sure if there was a person with a more beautiful smile in this world, but if there was, she was most certainly my sister. Although that beats out classics such as "your legs must be tired because you've been running around in my head/my dreams all day/night," "is heaven missing an angel, because I think I just found her," and one a former used to say to me, "nice shoes! Wanna f@ck?" it was still pretty cheesy.
The more subtle ones are, at least for me, more flattering. Perhaps it is because I believe there is more sincerity in them. People who are seriously interested in someone don't just up and say dumb things to them. (Well, okay, we do, but not stupid bad pick-up lines.) Instead they will hide behind a safe wall of insecurity by using comments that could be interpreted in multiple ways -- thus providing them a safety net in the event the pass is not favorably received.
That was the case for me this evening. I met a reasonably cute guy thanks to very unfortunate circumstances. Nothing like coming out of work, in this instance teaching a class at one of the gyms, to discover your driver's side window smashed to smithereens and your purse gone to really put a damper on your day. The sheriff's deputy who first responded was the previously mentioned reasonably cute guy. Here's how the subtle pass went down.
Because a smashed window and stolen purse wasn't enough crap for one night, it was also raining. A nice, 36* rain. In other words, it was damp and ridiculously cold, and we were having to stand outside dealing with police reports, which just sucked. So he invited me to sit in his cruiser. On our way there, I had to make my usual witty comments -- in times of stress in particular one of my coping mechanisms is to crack sarcastic jokes about everything -- about how I'd never been in the back of a police cruiser before. After a little joking about it, he said, "Well, if I was going to take you anywhere, I'd be taking you home."
Double entendre comment. My home? His home? What isn't coming across on the blog is the tone that he said it with. That is what pushes this from innocent comment to potential pass. Given the circumstances, I didn't respond either way. He was cute enough, and I know for a fact he has a good, steady job. I also think he was another bit of cougar-bait for me. It's not worth obsessing over, because the likelihood of anything coming of it is basically nil. Yes, we exchanged numbers -- because mine was required for his police report and his as part of the victim services.
What I will carry with me is also what my friend got out of her encounter -- a boost to the self esteem. In her case, she was out running routine errands. She's been happily married for several years, and has a 7 year old son. Her "radar" was a bit off, so she wasn't sure if she was actually hit upon or not. As she said to me in an email exchange, being married for so long makes you kind of "cold" to such things. However, whether it was a real pass or not, it added an extra bounce to her step. It made her glow. She was happy!
For me, it makes no difference if the deputy's comment was a pass or not. After teaching two cardio classes and then standing in the cold drizzle, I wasn't exactly feeling all that attractive. Oh, and we can't forget how sunny my mood was, too, with that whole stolen purse & destroyed car window thing. I took it as the flattering comment it may or may not have been intended to be, just like when I'd be out with friends at a gay bar and a lesbian would hit one me. It makes no difference if the passer is someone the passee finds attractive, because just knowing that someone found you beautiful (or handsome) is enough to brighten the darkest of days.
So whether it was his comment or the fact that a kind citizen discovered my discarded purse, which thankfully had my employee ID in it and he called down to the gym to let them know he had my stuff, it makes no difference. My night was improved and, in spite of having to drive home on a speedy interstate with no driver's window and 36* rain coming down, I had a little extra bounce to my step.
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