#9, K, and Other Musings
First off, something unrelated to this blog, really. While I'll be one of the first to agree that restaurant portion sizes in the US have gotten out of hand and have helped contribute to the obesity epidemic, at the same time when I dine at a restaurant with a nouvelle menu heavy on pricey seafood and micro greens, I don't want to leave my plate clean -- and my stomach still hungry.
Tonight's dinner was with #9, K, the analytical chemist. This is the one who would leave his phone in his truck for days on end, being out of touch, and then send me an epic long text message. He's 45 and never been married, and he comes from a very large Mennonite family (he left the Mennonite Church years ago, though).
In honesty, he was less attractive in person than his profile picture -- and his profile picture wasn't that attractive. I was giving him the benefit of the doubt and I do know for myself personality and intelligence is as attractive to me as appearances. However, I'd have to say that 6'1" for him was generous -- calculating in my heels he should've been 4-5" taller than me, and he wasn't -- and "about average" body type is code for "out of shape with a mild beer gut."
Still, all that was compensated for, in part, by his personality. He's definitely quirky and intelligent. I laughed a lot on this date, and I also may have pulled a small muscle rolling my eyes every now and then. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, if it balanced out with more serious conversation. At least tonight, that wasn't really the case. He's a goofball.
It wasn't a bad date, and it wasn't a great date. He'd be fun to hang out with as a friend, but I'm not feeling the dating connection at all. It's kind of sad that the most memorable part for me was when we were walking after dinner and being followed by a homeless guy talking nonsense... when I commented to K about it after we'd lost the homeless guy, he asked if I ever questioned my safety. I said no, and he said that didn't surprise him, that he was pretty sure I could kick the homeless guy's ass but that he'd have my back just in case.
I was in 5+" fuchsia suede heels, and he thinks I could take down the homeless guy. While he's probably right, still... really? Yet another frog to be kissed that didn't become a prince.
Meanwhile, I'm trying to not get discouraged again with the dating stuff. I do still have D (who I think was originally #4 but is now #13), who texts me pretty much daily. We'll see if that goes anywhere. I did also receive an email last night from an interesting divorcee, but one that I think isn't going to get past the first email exchange.
Why? Of all the reasons, theological incompatibility. He's a minister, I'm in ministry. He's a conservative who schooled at a Baptist college. I'm a liberal who serves in a generally liberal denomination.
You're probably wondering how that even came up in an initial email. See, he had shown up in my matches, and seeing all that I marked him a "maybe." A couple hours later, he winked at me, and that was shortly followed by an email. In his email, he laid out something that had apparently been a deal-breaker with other women: the fact that his two youngest children are adopted and of a different race.
What-ever. This is me.
But since he laid that out, and knowing from our profiles and comments in emails that we are both busy people, I said I didn't want to waste his time and I wasn't sure about our religious/theological compatibility. I shared that I'm the daughter of a conservative Baptist minister who has his Th.D., and that I, after prayerful consideration, have left that ideology behind and I happily serve in a more theologically liberal congregation that underscores somewhat my more socially liberal leanings... but that I may be making an egregious assumption, too!
He can't be too conservative if he has two adopted children of a different race, and if he still contacted me knowing in many churches I'd be consider a "worship pastor;" he even mentioned that in his email. Still, not a drinker and other indications of strong Baptist leanings... I'm not going to lose any sleep over this one, that's for sure.
Meanwhile, I have a few others to drop some initial emails to and see if anything at all develops. It's hard to not get discouraged, but tomorrow is another day and perhaps in my Daily Matches will be the man I'm looking for.
Tonight's dinner was with #9, K, the analytical chemist. This is the one who would leave his phone in his truck for days on end, being out of touch, and then send me an epic long text message. He's 45 and never been married, and he comes from a very large Mennonite family (he left the Mennonite Church years ago, though).
In honesty, he was less attractive in person than his profile picture -- and his profile picture wasn't that attractive. I was giving him the benefit of the doubt and I do know for myself personality and intelligence is as attractive to me as appearances. However, I'd have to say that 6'1" for him was generous -- calculating in my heels he should've been 4-5" taller than me, and he wasn't -- and "about average" body type is code for "out of shape with a mild beer gut."
Still, all that was compensated for, in part, by his personality. He's definitely quirky and intelligent. I laughed a lot on this date, and I also may have pulled a small muscle rolling my eyes every now and then. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, if it balanced out with more serious conversation. At least tonight, that wasn't really the case. He's a goofball.
It wasn't a bad date, and it wasn't a great date. He'd be fun to hang out with as a friend, but I'm not feeling the dating connection at all. It's kind of sad that the most memorable part for me was when we were walking after dinner and being followed by a homeless guy talking nonsense... when I commented to K about it after we'd lost the homeless guy, he asked if I ever questioned my safety. I said no, and he said that didn't surprise him, that he was pretty sure I could kick the homeless guy's ass but that he'd have my back just in case.
I was in 5+" fuchsia suede heels, and he thinks I could take down the homeless guy. While he's probably right, still... really? Yet another frog to be kissed that didn't become a prince.
Meanwhile, I'm trying to not get discouraged again with the dating stuff. I do still have D (who I think was originally #4 but is now #13), who texts me pretty much daily. We'll see if that goes anywhere. I did also receive an email last night from an interesting divorcee, but one that I think isn't going to get past the first email exchange.
Why? Of all the reasons, theological incompatibility. He's a minister, I'm in ministry. He's a conservative who schooled at a Baptist college. I'm a liberal who serves in a generally liberal denomination.
You're probably wondering how that even came up in an initial email. See, he had shown up in my matches, and seeing all that I marked him a "maybe." A couple hours later, he winked at me, and that was shortly followed by an email. In his email, he laid out something that had apparently been a deal-breaker with other women: the fact that his two youngest children are adopted and of a different race.
What-ever. This is me.
But since he laid that out, and knowing from our profiles and comments in emails that we are both busy people, I said I didn't want to waste his time and I wasn't sure about our religious/theological compatibility. I shared that I'm the daughter of a conservative Baptist minister who has his Th.D., and that I, after prayerful consideration, have left that ideology behind and I happily serve in a more theologically liberal congregation that underscores somewhat my more socially liberal leanings... but that I may be making an egregious assumption, too!
He can't be too conservative if he has two adopted children of a different race, and if he still contacted me knowing in many churches I'd be consider a "worship pastor;" he even mentioned that in his email. Still, not a drinker and other indications of strong Baptist leanings... I'm not going to lose any sleep over this one, that's for sure.
Meanwhile, I have a few others to drop some initial emails to and see if anything at all develops. It's hard to not get discouraged, but tomorrow is another day and perhaps in my Daily Matches will be the man I'm looking for.
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