Down Boy, Deja vu, and Facepalm
If there is one thing I have always been, it is a very quick study, a good student. Our infamous Mr. P was my instructor, so to say, when it came to the art of sexting. Now he had his shortcomings, but still he was my first when it came to R and X-rated texts.
Now, apparently, I'm the teacher. But, I'm getting a little ahead of myself.
More than once during the epic phone conversation that ended shortly before 2:00 this morning, J spoke openly and frankly about still talking with and meeting other people. He also said that he wanted to see me again. (I'm just recapping the previous post to set up what comes next.) Still, part of me was not surprised when he texted when he got off work this afternoon.
Cue 1.5 hour or so texting conversation. I have to say, so far I can't complain about his communication skills.
We'll get to the subject matter of the texting convo in a moment -- that would be the "facepalm" portion of the title -- although based on the introductory paragraphs you probably have a inkling of what it will be about. First we need to address "down boy" and "deja vu."
He wanted to see me again. Tonight. At my house. He pressed and made offers, including bringing me dinner. I had to say multiple times, "no." On Mondays, I get off work late and need to shower, my house is a disaster, and I'm exhausted after two very short nights of sleep. Even though he promised to have me in bed by my bedtime, whenever that was, I still said no. It wasn't that I didn't want to see him, not that at all. It was just too short of notice. Not even 14 hours previous he was saying that he wanted to still meet other people, and then wham! I want to see you again. Tonight. Now. I don't care about the status of your house, I'll be there to see you, not your apartment. And it wasn't about sex, although there would've been some PG/PG-13 rated action.
Down, boy!
It also brought back some memories of P. I haven't told J this, and I don't know if I ever will. Shortly after P and I started dating, there was the night where I got buzzed on some wine and the real sexting began. During that sexting, he offered more than once to drive down to my place. Like J, P almost wouldn't take no for an answer.
Deja vu.
Now we come to the facepalm portion. J is, as we all know, recently divorced. Apparently his ex-wife was too busy catting around on him to take care of him in certain ways. I've heard that married/long-term relationship sex can get monotonous, boring, and that couples are encouraged to periodically and regularly liven things up. Yes, they had 3 kids in the house so some of the more freaky stuff probably wouldn't have been the best idea, but what is wrong with sending suggestive and even explicit texts?
Thus we have lesson #1 in sexting. My name is Professor Suz, and there will be no final exam. This course will be graded on a continually rolling basis.
Fortunately, J is a pretty quick study, at least when it comes to PG/PG-13 sexts. I'm perfectly fine with saving the R and X-rated stuff for later. In spite of what I was describing via the sexting, I also made it clear that that kind of stuff -- pretty much any sex, actually -- wouldn't come until we were exclusive. Yeah, yeah, I know I jumped P without that prerequisite and I've written blogs about me embracing my sexual appetite. I'm actually thinking more of him, the whole "treading lightly" thing.
It wasn't that J had never sexed that caused me to facepalm. It was his answers to certain questions. For all of P's shortcomings when it came to the sexting, primarily his avoidance of generally reciprocating because he only cared what I would do to him, the man knew what he wanted and what he liked. J seems to, at least at this point, have no opinions. When I told him I'd need a little more background information, he said that "he was a guy, that should be enough." Uh, no. I explained that I meant his fetishes, what got him going. Lingerie? S & M? Bondage? Role playing?
At that point, he made some comment about there not being anything he wouldn't like. That's when I stepped away from the sexting for a moment and gave him the advice to be careful what kind of women he said that to. I didn't see him as someone into rough sex, rape fantasies, that kind of stuff. He agreed.
Trying to pin him down on details is tricky, not because he's not into the sexting or into me, but because in many things he truly has no opinion -- he really is open to most anything -- and there are things he's never experienced. Lace or satin/silk lingerie? Too many choices. Submissive or dominant? Either, and both.
Face, meet palm. Palm, meet face.
Even with my limited sexual experience, I've done considerably freakier things than he has. Again, I feel like the exotic creature. Or, as I told my fantastic girlfriend M (the one from MN), although I've never been with a virgin, I'm pretty sure this is what it would be like.
I have to say, the chemistry for me is developing. It's more of a slow-growing burn than a flash, and I think that's a good thing. He did also score some serious points with his sexting, even though it was pretty PG-13. He cares about his partner having as much fun as he does, and that is something that P never cared about. J went so far as to tell me he offers a "satisfaction guarantee."
Oh, yeah, serious points.
Meanwhile, our recurring bachelor, who we'll just go ahead and call #13, D, replied to my email and asked if I texted. (LOL! But I digress.) I told him that I did, but that one of my quirks is that I don't give out my number right away. However, if he sends me his, he'll have a text from me pretty much as soon as I get the email. We'll see if I get a response.
Now, I have some sleep to catch up on. Good night, y'all.
Now, apparently, I'm the teacher. But, I'm getting a little ahead of myself.
More than once during the epic phone conversation that ended shortly before 2:00 this morning, J spoke openly and frankly about still talking with and meeting other people. He also said that he wanted to see me again. (I'm just recapping the previous post to set up what comes next.) Still, part of me was not surprised when he texted when he got off work this afternoon.
Cue 1.5 hour or so texting conversation. I have to say, so far I can't complain about his communication skills.
We'll get to the subject matter of the texting convo in a moment -- that would be the "facepalm" portion of the title -- although based on the introductory paragraphs you probably have a inkling of what it will be about. First we need to address "down boy" and "deja vu."
He wanted to see me again. Tonight. At my house. He pressed and made offers, including bringing me dinner. I had to say multiple times, "no." On Mondays, I get off work late and need to shower, my house is a disaster, and I'm exhausted after two very short nights of sleep. Even though he promised to have me in bed by my bedtime, whenever that was, I still said no. It wasn't that I didn't want to see him, not that at all. It was just too short of notice. Not even 14 hours previous he was saying that he wanted to still meet other people, and then wham! I want to see you again. Tonight. Now. I don't care about the status of your house, I'll be there to see you, not your apartment. And it wasn't about sex, although there would've been some PG/PG-13 rated action.
Down, boy!
It also brought back some memories of P. I haven't told J this, and I don't know if I ever will. Shortly after P and I started dating, there was the night where I got buzzed on some wine and the real sexting began. During that sexting, he offered more than once to drive down to my place. Like J, P almost wouldn't take no for an answer.
Deja vu.
Now we come to the facepalm portion. J is, as we all know, recently divorced. Apparently his ex-wife was too busy catting around on him to take care of him in certain ways. I've heard that married/long-term relationship sex can get monotonous, boring, and that couples are encouraged to periodically and regularly liven things up. Yes, they had 3 kids in the house so some of the more freaky stuff probably wouldn't have been the best idea, but what is wrong with sending suggestive and even explicit texts?
Thus we have lesson #1 in sexting. My name is Professor Suz, and there will be no final exam. This course will be graded on a continually rolling basis.
Fortunately, J is a pretty quick study, at least when it comes to PG/PG-13 sexts. I'm perfectly fine with saving the R and X-rated stuff for later. In spite of what I was describing via the sexting, I also made it clear that that kind of stuff -- pretty much any sex, actually -- wouldn't come until we were exclusive. Yeah, yeah, I know I jumped P without that prerequisite and I've written blogs about me embracing my sexual appetite. I'm actually thinking more of him, the whole "treading lightly" thing.
It wasn't that J had never sexed that caused me to facepalm. It was his answers to certain questions. For all of P's shortcomings when it came to the sexting, primarily his avoidance of generally reciprocating because he only cared what I would do to him, the man knew what he wanted and what he liked. J seems to, at least at this point, have no opinions. When I told him I'd need a little more background information, he said that "he was a guy, that should be enough." Uh, no. I explained that I meant his fetishes, what got him going. Lingerie? S & M? Bondage? Role playing?
At that point, he made some comment about there not being anything he wouldn't like. That's when I stepped away from the sexting for a moment and gave him the advice to be careful what kind of women he said that to. I didn't see him as someone into rough sex, rape fantasies, that kind of stuff. He agreed.
Trying to pin him down on details is tricky, not because he's not into the sexting or into me, but because in many things he truly has no opinion -- he really is open to most anything -- and there are things he's never experienced. Lace or satin/silk lingerie? Too many choices. Submissive or dominant? Either, and both.
Face, meet palm. Palm, meet face.
Even with my limited sexual experience, I've done considerably freakier things than he has. Again, I feel like the exotic creature. Or, as I told my fantastic girlfriend M (the one from MN), although I've never been with a virgin, I'm pretty sure this is what it would be like.
I have to say, the chemistry for me is developing. It's more of a slow-growing burn than a flash, and I think that's a good thing. He did also score some serious points with his sexting, even though it was pretty PG-13. He cares about his partner having as much fun as he does, and that is something that P never cared about. J went so far as to tell me he offers a "satisfaction guarantee."
Oh, yeah, serious points.
Meanwhile, our recurring bachelor, who we'll just go ahead and call #13, D, replied to my email and asked if I texted. (LOL! But I digress.) I told him that I did, but that one of my quirks is that I don't give out my number right away. However, if he sends me his, he'll have a text from me pretty much as soon as I get the email. We'll see if I get a response.
Now, I have some sleep to catch up on. Good night, y'all.
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